《父母離去前，一定要做的33件事》

《父母離去前，一定要做的33件事》

周月明 著

二零一二年七月三十日是我和我太太永遠不會忘記的日子- 在那天,我們一起見證了兒子的誕生,一起踏入人生的另一個階段成為父母. 第一眼看著兒子哇哇落地, 我倍感興奮和隨之而來肩上沉重的責任感. 轉眼間兒子已經快五個月大了, 過去五個月照顧兒子的點滴- 除了眾人眼中的甜蜜, 幸福, 箇中的辛勞, 擔憂, 讓我更明白父母的偉大, 更感激自己父母當年為了我作出的一切犧牲, 也讓我反思自己和父母相處的方式, 以及更珍惜和兩老一起的時間.

我一定要更孝順他們! 而你們呢?

你，有多久沒和爸媽聊天了?

你,有多久沒主動關心父母了？

你, 還記得上一次幫父母慶祝生日的情景嗎?...

你算過還剩多少與父母相處的時間？

二十年？三十年？永遠......？

算算看，如果，你的父母現在50歲，你還有多少時間相處 ：

30年Ｘ30天Ｘ3.96小時＝3564小時÷24＝148.5天

（父母剩下的壽命Ｘ每年見到父母的天數Ｘ每天相處的時間÷24小時）

也就是說，你和父母相處的時間，也許只剩下148.5天了!

最近閒逛書店時, 偶然看到了周月明小姐的<父母離去前，一定要做的33件事>這本書，只是駐足翻看了幾頁已讓我感觸良多。書中33篇文章，都是來自作者或周邊朋友的親身經歷，真實感人。以自然、輕鬆的筆調代替枯燥說教的方式，讓人更明白該如何應對，並從中獲得新的體悟. 其中的幾個小故事和小提議,淺白但給我留下了深刻印象:

◆    回家, 任何時候都不晚;

◆    把從小到大，充滿回憶的照片整理成相簿

◆    拋開羞澀，給父母一個大大的擁抱

◆    幫父母慶祝結婚紀念日

◆    考量父母的身體狀況，安排一個小旅行

再多的金錢或物質，都不如一些生活中的小事所能帶來的滿滿幸福. 正如書中所說, 有些事不能等，現在、立刻、馬上就去做. 時間，你永遠都有、也可能永遠都沒有，不要讓後悔成為終身的遺憾！

以下是其中的一個小故事:

慶祝父母的結婚紀念日 

不久前，我交了男朋友。為了紀念我們交往一個月，朋友們寄來一封郵件說「恭喜」，我心裡很開心。 
能有人為自己的紀念日慶祝，真的很幸福。 
基本上，我爸媽還算感情融洽，但我知道他們最近晚上常吵架。我希望他們能像我和男友一樣恩愛。於是我擬定計劃，半強制地將弟弟也捲進來，策劃要在他們的結婚紀念日當天來個驚喜！ 
不過，我們並不知道父母的結婚紀念日是哪一天。要是直接問清楚，就少了那份驚喜感，所以我和分弟分頭打聽。我查看媽媽的手機和記事本，但都查不出線索。最後，弟弟找到他們婚禮的照片，右下角印有日期，這才真相大白。我和弟弟一起為那天的到來計劃一場驚喜。 
要是爸爸當天太晚回來，計劃便會告吹，所以我事先安排，在結婚紀念日當天準備了兩束花。當父母都湊齊時，我送爸爸花，弟弟送媽媽花。 
「爸，媽，今天是你們的結婚紀念日，恭喜！」 
現場停頓了片刻。也許是過於驚訝，他們一時不知做何反應。 
向來容易落淚的媽媽馬上熱淚盈眶。不過，我倒是沒料到爸爸會那麼感動。看他們兩人高興的模樣，我也不禁胸口一熱，跟著想哭。 
不過後來我才明白，照片上顯示的日期是「結婚請客」當天，似乎不是真正的結婚紀念日。但看他們兩人笑得那麼開懷，就得過且過吧！結婚紀念日這種事，就算辦再多次也不嫌多。 

還記得我在讀中二時的週記中寫到和爸媽一同回鄉探望外婆, 班主任鼓勵我珍惜和家人相處的時間, 提及她的外婆已離世, 並留下了 “樹欲靜而恩不息，子欲養而親不在” 十四個字. 當時的我並沒有什麼特別感覺. 直到幾年後外公去世了, 才真正感受到這十四個字的真正意思.

最近發覺自己的學生中有些同學因為覺得父母的關愛太嚴格, 或是嫌他們囉嗦, 和父母鬧翻, 弄得形同陌路一般, 話不投機半句多, 心里很是難受. 年少輕狂, 我也經歷過青年人成長必經的反叛期. 雖然和你們說“樹欲靜而恩不息，子欲養而親不在”好像很遙遠, 但請大家記住述的方程式, 珍惜那148.5天.


分享者﹕雷捷 老師

《The Last Lecture》

The Last Lecture

by Randy Pausch

920 PAU

How would you spend the final days in your life if your knew it was your last chance?

Randy Pausch, a university professor, chose to embark on a project to discuss everything he wanted his children to know after he was diagnosed of the terminal pancreatic cancer.  His book was a recollection of how he achieved his childhood dream and how he had enabled the dream of the others.

You might come across some “brick walls” (a.k.a. obstacles / difficulties) while attempting to achieve your dream. Pausch told us that brick walls were there for a reason. They are there to let us prove how badly we want things. If you want it badly, you would work it out anyway, in one way or another. 

Life is short and you only live once. It is important to live your life to its fullest without regrets and to do so, it requires a clear understanding of oneself. This book is a good read for those who love reflection.

分享者﹕陳國鋒 老師

《The Dairy of Anne Frank》

The Diary of Anne Frank

Overview

Everyone has their own story. The Dairy of Anne Frank is a story about the lives of a Jewish girl and her family hiding in a warehouse during World War II. When Anne wrote her diary, she would never have imagined that her personal story could have impact on millions of people. Her true story brings me lots of memories and inspiration.

Observation, experience and reminiscence

Reading the Diary of Anne Frank, I find that we share a lot of similarities. In her diary, she revealed that there was nobody she could trust or rely on. Therefore, she decided to address the diary ‘Kitty’ and confide everything to this imaginary friend. It seems to me that her childhood is full of loneliness. Compare with Anne, I am a lot more fortunate given that I was born in a peaceful and prosperous city. However, being the only child in my family with working parents, I was accustomed to be alone. When I was lonely and bored, I used to talk to myself as if there was somebody else. Sometimes, I imagined myself as a teacher and presented the whole chapter in front of the ‘audience’. There were at times I could not help feeling that I was such a strange person who talked with the air. Yet, after meeting Anne, I can totally understand why she needed Kitty.

From the letters to Kitty, I can see that there is a change of Anne throughout the years. She starts her first diary entry at the age of thirteen and her early entries are something very subtle and personal. For example, she mentions her friends, schools, family, relationship and social life. These are very typical topics that teenage girl would write about. However, over the two next years, a new Anne has been emerged. This Anne becomes more patient, considerate, mature and insightful. She is aware of the threat of the war. She feels guilty about her luck in having a hiding place when others are suffering in concentration camps. Despite the fact that Nazi Laws strictly affect the lifestyle of Anne, she never complains nor despairs but moves on her new life. She accepts the limitation and becomes more optimistic. This can be revealed in her letter that ‘in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.’ The adult diary not only indicates the growth of a naïve child to a mature adult but also reflects how this complicated situation catalyzes her maturity.

Inspiration and reflection

The optimistic attitude of Anne makes of think of teenagers in Hong Kong. We are now living in a place that is free from war or political danger. However, it is not uncommon to hear the news that local teenagers are so stressed that some even destroy their lives by playing truant, taking drugs, abusing alcohol or committing suicides. To me, it is rather ironical that people who are suffering from war are trying their best to survive whilst those who are living peacefully terminate their lives by committing suicides. These tragedies show that teenagers in Hong Kong are psychologically fragile and vulnerable and they are not good at expressing their feelings. In fact, keeping a diary or writing blogs is one of the easiest and most effective ways in dealing with pressure. Therefore, I suggest that you should write diaries and set your emotion free there. By setting your mind free, I do not mean that you should express your anger or detail your dissatisfaction. Instead, it is a second chance for you to think from another perspective. Every coin has two sides. If you can look from different perspectives, your obstacle can turn to be a motivating factor, too!

Conclusion

To conclude, the story of Anne Frank is not purely a story narrating adolescent thoughts and problems but a story that promotes positive attitudes. I hope that you will take a look of this book after reading my book report. I also hope that you are not just following what Anne think thinks of in her entries but also appreciating her enthusiasm of life and peace.

分享者﹕管瑩胤 老師

香港作家書籍展

借出書籍作家包括﹕倪匡、金庸、胡燕青、也斯、王良和、劉以鬯、小思

歡迎師生到圖書館預約借閱。

《Justice, 正義：一場思辨之旅》

《Justice, 正義：一場思辨之旅》                          

 Michael Sandel

198.57 8753

本書並不是一本小說, 而是一個課堂, 當中又包含很多大大小小不同故事, 比小說更引人入勝。Justice是哈佛大學有史以來最受歡迎的課程之一。近千名學生擠滿哈佛大學Sanders禮堂，聆聽Sandel教授談論正義、平等、民主和公民權。

其中有一堂故事特別印象深刻的。相信大家都有留意近期熱門電影少年pi, 戲中主角與老虎經歷了一場緊張而又驚險的海上漂流之旅。戲中的老虎叫Richard Parker, 就是源於英國一個活生生的吃人肉的案例。十九世紀帆船Mignonette號在南大西洋上遇難，船員四名，Dudley是船長，Stevens是大副，Brooks是水手，;還有打雜的少年，十七歲的Richard Parker，在海上漂流十九天後，船長決定殺死他們當中最孱弱的打雜少年，這樣他們就得以賴他的血肉維生。事後三人獲救返回英國,但女王起訴Dudley與Stevens謀殺, 這個英國案例在法學院非常有名。

如果你身處其中，你會怎麼辦?你會做出與他們一樣的選擇?

有多少人會同意他們「無罪」?

如果Dudley和Steven有詢問Richard Parker，取得他的同意，被殺的意願，而這樣是否可以讓他們免除謀殺罪？

Dudley有提議抽籤，假設他們都同意抽簽了,假設抽籤的結果是打雜少年抽到，有多少人會認為這是道德上可以接受的?

這個少年沒有家人，其它三個人在英國都有家庭，他們有妻有小。因為關切他們家鄉的親人和家屬，這樣又說得過去嗎?

Sandel教授不會對每個案例或是理論下結論,而是透過與學生提問及討論, 了解不同人對事情的思考方式。從討論中,他帶出這些不同思考模式,再引發反思:

不少同學傾向結果主義論，即將道德定位在結果對於世界的影響上,只要事情對社會有最大的利益。如當時倫敦的報紙和主流民意是同情Dudley與Stevens的，報紙還說，這個少年沒有家庭，其它三個人都有家庭，有妻有小。如果不是因為對考慮到家人，他們絕對不會這樣做的。這是三對一，更是所有家屬加起來對一個人。事實上，當繼續深入討論時，人們開始遲疑這個看法。

大家提出另一類看法,是道德推論法,是將道德定位在某些絕對的道德標準上，不管結果如何，都將道德定義在某些類型的責任和權力上。如有同學提出既使殺人只為了讓自己過得更好，但都是謀殺。無論如何應該一視同仁、公平的對待，打雜少年也有其本基本權利。

書中舉出大大小小不同的故事, 有虛構的,有真實的, 也隱含現今香港社會一些最熱門的話題, 如同性婚姻、愛國主義和權利。在不同的故事中, 教授以提問和討論的方式,引導同學以新的角度來重新思考那些熟悉的爭議。在對立矛盾的觀點上, 加強同學的道德價值信念。在支持與反對意見兩極化的社會, 能夠建立個人的觀點。

分享者﹕謝嘉穎 老師

《Five Point Someone》

Five Point Someone

Probably you may find the title Five Point Someone unfamiliar, but you should have heard of the blockbuster Three Idiots. Three Idiots is actually an adapted film version of this novel written by an Indian writer Chetan Bhagat. The humour, excitement and energy of the film brought me to the original version.

With things happening on three mechanical engineering students in the Indian Institute of Technology Delhi, the author attempts to criticize the current Indian education system, which highly values grades more than anything else. The teaching in the college is depicted as uninspiring and monotonous that students’ creativity is seriously suppressed.

To fight against the unfair grading system of the school, Hari, Ryan and Alok decide to share their assignments, classes and laboratory observations. One person will only do these by turn. The others will simply copy the work or notes. While most readers might be delighted by students’ naughtiness, as a teacher, I find this scene saddening that students dislike learning and even escape from it. The talented are not given opportunity to develop their potentials.

The scene also reminds me of the society in which we are living today. Hong Kong society is not less competitive than India. Students have been well informed that only good academic achievements can bring them a prosperous and promising future. Both students and parents are obsessed with looking for best schools and tutorial classes for the sake of academic excellence. Yet, do students learn solely for examinations? Or I would better ask “Should students learn solely for examinations?’ That is a question worth pondering.

To me, learning is far broader than academic achievements. It is about developing my character, cultivating value system, training my skills and broadening my horizons. Knowledge enables me to make wise decision with sound judgment. An education system ignoring all these crucial elements is risky not only to students, but also the society. Hopefully the writer’s views can be heard and responded.

The film is not full adaptation of the book. It is certainly worthwhile to read it. I am sure you will be exhilarated by this page-turner!

分享者﹕胡燕璇 老師

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